45

No, not that 45. Today is my 45th birthday. It’s also the day after graduation for what has been an extraordinarily busy year. I feel like it’s been a really wonderful one, though.

On the personal side of life, things couldn’t be better. I feel like I need to focus more on reflecting on that, but when I do I’m just massively appreciative. My kids are healthy, loving, and brilliant. My wife and I are frequently overwhelmed but we make a great team.  We were lucky enough to move last summer, enjoy some special trips, and watch three amazing people grow up a little more.

Work has been crazy. I served as department chair this year and, while there is some satisfaction in the work I’ve done as a result, it is pretty demanding. It made it hard to be the kind of teacher I am used to being.  At the same time, this year also involved stepping into a new position as mentor to a group of 11 amazing first-years (now sophomores!!). They’ve really made my year fulfilling in ways I can’t even express yet.

I got to present my new work on Vietnam to a non-academic audience.  I got to bring some of that work together in a public history exhibit–my first time ever doing that kind of work.  As I continue to work on the book, I also got funding to put together a public stage performance based on the oral histories I’ve collected.

In short, I feel lucky, fortunate, even blessed.

Reaching 45 is less traumatic than I thought it was going to be. I’m solidly and undeniably middle-aged, but that’s nothing new. I feel productive and unproductive at the same time, the challenges of midlife and masculinity. On the plus side, Sinatra was 45 when he left Capitol Records and started Reprise and he put out a whole bunch of great albums then.

So I got that to look forward to.